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When something weighs on you

What weighs on you inside: a sorrow, a fear, a worry that keeps you awake, loneliness. Here are readings to understand what you feel and to carry it a little better.

When something weighs on you insideA worry, a sorrow or a fear weighs less once it comes out. What you can do when something weighs on you: name it, share it, write it down and look after yourself.4 min read Self-compassion: treating yourself as you would treat a friendSelf-compassion means treating yourself with the kindness you would show someone you love. What it is according to Kristin Neff, what research says and how to begin.4 min read Growing after a blowAfter a loss or a crisis, some people notice changes they did not expect. What post-traumatic growth is, what it is not and what science still questions.4 min read A star for youMany people find it hard to ask for support for themselves. Why asking for company is not selfish and why letting others be with you is also a generous act.4 min read When you can’t stop going over itGoing over the same thing again and again has a name: rumination. What it is, why it doesn’t help solve anything and what to do to get out of the loop.4 min read Night-time worriesAt night everything seems more serious. Why worries grow at bedtime and a simple technique, studied by psychology, so they don’t take your sleep.4 min read Crying: why it sometimes brings reliefCrying doesn’t always bring release. What research has found about when tears bring relief, when they don’t and why there is no need to be ashamed of them.4 min read Naming what you feelSaying “I’m sad”, “I’m afraid” or “I can’t go on” makes the emotion weigh a little less. What neuroscience has seen and how to find the word.4 min read Asking for help when it’s hardWe think we’ll be a nuisance or be told no. Studies show that people are far more willing to help than we think. How to ask for help.4 min read Guilt and shame are not the same thingGuilt says “I did something wrong”; shame says “I am what is wrong”. What June Tangney has found about the two and why it helps to tell them apart.4 min read When you compare yourself with othersComparing ourselves is something we do without meaning to. What Leon Festinger explained about why we do it and how to stop it always leaving us below.4 min read The tiredness that sleep doesn’t take awayThere is a tiredness that a weekend doesn’t shift. What burnout is according to Christina Maslach and the WHO, how to recognise it and what helps.4 min read The fear of not doing it perfectlyPerfectionism is not wanting to do things well: it is being unable to bear doing them less than perfectly. What Paul Hewitt and Gordon Flett have found.4 min read Feeling you don’t deserve what you’ve achievedBelieving you got here by luck and that one day they will find out. What Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes described and what helps when it happens to you.4 min read When autumn comes and your mood dropsAfter the clocks go back it gets dark earlier and many people’s mood drops. What seasonal affective disorder is, what is known about light, and when to seek help.5 min read Anxiety: when the body sounds the alarmWhy anxiety is felt so strongly in the body, why it goes off without any danger, when it is normal, when to see someone, and what helps according to research.5 min read Writing about what hurtsWhat James Pennebaker found when he asked people to write about what hurt them most, what studies have not confirmed, and how you can try it yourself.5 min read What to do during a panic attackWhat a panic attack is, why fear surges within minutes, what to do while it lasts, how to support someone who has one, and when to see a doctor.6 min read What sadness is forSadness is not a fault. What Joseph Forgas’s experiments found, how it differs from depression and why it helps to let it be.5 min read When you always expect the worstIf your mind always jumps to the worst ending, you are not alone. What catastrophising is, how many worries really come true and what helps to slow it down.6 min read Talking to yourself as you would to someone elseThe voice inside can lift you up or drag you down. What Ethan Kross has found about talking to yourself as “you” or by name, and what to do if that voice turns on you.5 min read A place to get it off your chest without saying who you areA place to share what weighs on you without saying who you are. Write, light a star and others will keep you company with kind words. No accounts and no cookies.2 min read If you feel lonely todayIf you feel lonely today, light a star in a shared universe and say what’s happening. Others will see it and keep you company. Free and anonymous.1 min read

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