When someone is going through a hard time, grand speeches aren’t needed. What comforts most is feeling understood and knowing you’re not alone. These are the phrases used to keep people company in A shared universe, written from what psychology says about comfort.
For someone going through a hard time
You’re not alone
It makes sense that it hurts
There is light, even if you can’t see it now
What you feel now won’t last forever
That’s a lot to carry
I’ll stay with you a while
What you feel matters
It’s okay not to be okay
You don’t have to go through it alone
You can be just as you are here
You matter
You’re doing what you can, and it’s enough
You deserve to be looked after
There are still good days to come
Every small step counts
Little by little, a way will open
Your story doesn’t end here
I hope you find a little peace
May life be gentle with you today
Take all the time you need
For someone waiting for news
Whatever happens, you won’t face it alone
I hope the news you’re waiting for comes
I’ll be thinking of you that day
Your hope is brave too
May that day find you strong
It’s normal for it to worry you
I’m with you while you wait
Waiting is tiring too, and that’s understandable
For someone who has lost a loved one
I’m truly sorry
Love doesn’t leave
Their light is still here
Missing someone is another way of loving
What they left you stays with you
Those we love are never forgotten
I’m with you in this memory
Grief has no deadline
To share someone’s joy
I’m so happy for you
What a joy to read you
You deserve it
Celebrating with you
What a lovely thing to share
This gives others hope too
Phrases best avoided
Some phrases are said with love but leave the other person more alone:
“Everything happens for a reason”: it suggests their pain has a meaning they can’t see.
“At least…”: it compares and makes light of what they feel.
“Be strong”: it asks them not to show what they feel, just when they need to.
“You’ll see, it’s nothing”: it promises something nobody knows.
What helps most is acknowledging what they feel, without making light of it, and letting them know you’re there.